Spanking or scolding?
I use both! Proud to say I use both but with lots of love and explanation. My kids are really young still to comprehend some of the explanation, I think. However, given the way they respond to the whole thing, maybe they understand.
How I'm doing it now is basically the same as how I was brought up. Discipline with lots of love and support. We were not beaten up for no reason. (Yes, I used the word beaten up *smile) Looking back, I am thankful we were beaten up because I think it's partly reason for how we grew up. Ehem...
Nowadays, I wish some kids I see were given the ass-beating of their lives. You know, bullies, tantrums, bad language, bad manners and the like. I guess that with all the increasingly busier parents, child protection and human rights blah-blah in our society now, disciplining children just might have taken a different direction.
In our house, the kdis are reprimanded or spanked when necessary. In cases when verbal reprimand will do, they are given that. My husband and I also try not to overrule each other when one of us is reprimanding the kids. When a parent does that to another person, it makes the process confusing and the parent reprimanded not credible to the child. We give punishments fairly. When my preschool girls were smaller, they were already spanked. Yes, that early. Now, we are reaping the rewards. They are very disciplined and well-behaved except for the usual kakulitan. At the same time, they are growing up to be happy children. What's more, the school they go to recognize them for their kindness and good manners. (They get merit cards for these.)
Does your kid overdo himself or herself? Does his behavior now make you think about spanking but don't? If you answer yes, spanking might be an option for you. Depending on how far the lack of discipline has become, of course.
However, spanking cannot be successful without love and affection. When it's all spanking, you'll be infusing fear and hatred in their young minds. So do it with a lot of discretion.